Relaxed Basics + My Thoughts On Fear

I don’t write a lot of deeply personal posts here, but something about preparing to travel to India is causing me to be more vulnerable & transparent.  I can feel myself opening up in ways I never have before, so it’s only natural that some of that will spill over into my blog content as well.  This entire journey that will take place over the course of the next 4 months is going to be a transformative one for me – I can already see it happening.

Last night, we had a planning meeting for our India trip – myself & the small team of women I’m traveling with met with the director of Freedom Firm to discuss more details surrounding the camp where we’ll be serving and what to expect.  I’m not going to lie, I walked away from that dinner feeling slightly overwhelmed and, if I’m being honest, downright afraid.  The more real this trip becomes, the more my insecurities threaten to get the best of me.

Afterwards, while I was driving home, I had a million thoughts rushing through my head & I started to doubt if I should even be going on this trip.  Who am I to be leading these girls?  How can I possibly relate to what they’ve gone through?  What makes me think that I can make a difference?  I don’t even speak their language.  I’m so unqualified!

On & on & on…those voices of doubt continued to chip away at my confidence, passion & certainty about this opportunity.  Like tiny arrows piercing through the armor of my resolute spirit, leaving their mark & allowing the darkness to seep in.  I was left feeling shaken and unsettled rather than inspired & enthusiastic.

Fear is a dangerous thing because it tricks our mind into believing that those negative thoughts are actually truths.  But they aren’t.  Fear is a liar.  It can limit us, blur our vision and, worst of all, if we succumb to it, it has the power to prevent us from taking risks and going outside our comfort zone.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be a woman who lives only in the shelter of complacency.  I want to be brave & fearless and live with arms outstretched, welcoming new experiences & challenges my way.  So what if I fail?  I will learn valuable lessons, grow stronger because of it & move forward with a clearer purpose than before.

So, even though the future is uncertain & I only have a limited amount of control over what happens, starting today I am CHOOSING to be hopeful instead of fearful, eager instead of worried and confident instead of intimidated.  Because the truth is – we get to decide what our attitude will be; we set the tone.  And I want for mine to be one that is positive, optimistic & assured.  How about you?

What I’m wearing:
Joe Fresh Shirt (similar here or here), a.n.a Cropped Wide Leg Pants,
c/o Aerosoles Wedge Espadrille (25% off when added to cart + free shipping),
Similar Bag, Similar Earrings, Madewell Cuff (similar here or here),
Nails: Essie Clothing Optional, Lips: L’Oreal Spiced Cider